Not impressed by Angola 2010

The 27^th African Cup of Nations is going to be memorable for a long time to come. A tournament that promised so much will forever be remembered for the rebel attack on the Togolese team which preceded the event. I really feel sorry for Egypt, who delivered a masterful performance on their way to winning the cup for an unprecedented 7^th time. My wish is that the sheer class of this Egyptian side will not be lost on genuine footie fans. Best attack with 15 goals, 2 against for best defence, 6 out of 6 wins, best player of the tournament, best goalkeeper, top goalscorer, discovery of the tournament, 19 CAN matches unbeaten, 3 consecutive trophies. I don’t think there will be a more comprehensive dominance of an international tournament in our lifetime!!!!

The might of the Pharaohs aside, the football was not of the highest quality we have come to expect at Nations’ Cups. Too many of the star players just did not turn up. Watching Yakubu Aiyegbeni lumbering around the pitch like a replete Kung-Fu Panda, I wondered if these stars may well have been left to be with their clubs. It was definite justice that the two teams who clearly had the players enthused about the tournamnet made it to the finals. Unbelievable goalkeeping howlers, shocking misses, stray passes – you’d struggle to find any more of these at a major international tourney than was witnessed in Angola.

Let's take a look at the winners and many losers at this particularly tainted CAN:

The Player: AHMED HASSAN. Inspirational figure and the embodiment of everything good about the Egyptian national team: technique, stamina, grit, passion, level headedness. I challenge each of us to watch a replay of the time between Cameroun’s goal and Egypt’s equalizer in their quarter final clash. Those few minutes were an amazing testimony to bouncing back when you get knocked down. I hope guys like Sulley Muntari were watching.

The Team: With huge respect for the surprise success of Ghana’s kids, I’d have to hand this over to the EGYPTIANS. In the Egypt-Algeria semi final, I came to appreciate the proverb: “form is temporary, class is permanent”. Algeria lost the plot completely while Egypt simply just kept playing the football, right until the end. They went on to trounce their bitter rivals, all just for keeping their cool. Pure Class.

The Game: Angola 4 -4 Mali. Many candidates here, including the aforementioned semi-final and the Algeria-Cote d’Ivoire quarter final. I think the opening game edges them all for the shock factor and a demonstration of the unpredictability that makes our game so beautiful.

The Goal: Kader Keita vs Algeria. Seeing is believing.

The Clowns: Emmanuel Eboue vs Ghana and Nadir Belhadj vs Egypt. What were they thinking??

The farcical: Algeria 0-0 Angola. This was scandalous. The most annoying thing however is that it is perfectly legal and no action can be taken against either side. Tough luck, Mali. Next time take your destiny into your own hands!!

The bottlers: The Elephants. How this team manages to wow so much and disappoint so wildly is beyond me. I am one of those who were utterly seduced by the glamour of their stars and left clutching my face in shame. Lesson for the players among us: the hottest girl at the bar may not be the werewolf you’ve been dreaming her to be. Spare yourself.

The handsome: Renard Herve. A coach so ripped you could see his abs creating corrugations on the front of his shirt. A woman’s dream and a lazy guy’s nightmare.

The beautiful: Ana Paula dos Santos. Some men are born lucky and some men are born as Jose Eduardo dos Santos!!

The ugly: All the referees and assistants. Seriously, did anybody see a good looking referee at this tournament? Exemplified by Coffi Codjia, the referees were uglier than their outrageous calls.

The fashion sense: Alain Giresse. There is something always right about wearing a pair of hard khaki pants, a well pressed shirt and a blazer that was cut for just you. The Gabonese head coach brings business casual attire in emphatic style to a sport that is both business and casual.

The nonsensical: CAF. All of the officials. First, they fail to correctly identify the security issues inherent in Cabinda. Second, they fail to offer the Togolese team any support whatsoever. To rub salt into wounds, they ban the Hawks from the next two subsequent CANs, in a stupid show of power.

The Best XI (4-1-2-1-2) : El Hadary (Egy), Bougherra (Alg), Goma (Egy), Inkoom (Gha), Tiene (CIV), Song (Cam), Hassan (Egy), Ziani (Alg), Asamoah (Gha), Gyan (Gha), Gedo (Egy).

The coach: Hassan Shehata. Living Legend.

That’s it for CAN Angola 2010 then. Let me know what you think. In the meantime, I'll get ready for my first Super Bowl weekend experience, wondering what it has on Champions’ League final day.